Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
Chuck Norris can make scissors beat rock.
When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
The Statue of Liberty is alive, but Chuck Norris told her not to move.
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
When batman is in trouble, he turns on the Chuck Norris signal.
They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
Micheal Jordan to Chuck Norris: I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours. Can you? Chuck Norris: (laughs) How do you think the earth spins?
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.