The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
Vote:
has 82.37 % from 331 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time, travel
Chuck Norris can make scissors beat rock.
Vote:
has 82.34 % from 368 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
Vote:
has 82.26 % from 196 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
The Statue of Liberty is alive, but Chuck Norris told her not to move.
Vote:
has 82.25 % from 266 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
Vote:
has 82.20 % from 259 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
When batman is in trouble, he turns on the Chuck Norris signal.
Vote:
has 82.18 % from 315 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
Vote:
has 82.07 % from 448 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
Vote:
has 82.05 % from 502 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Micheal Jordan to Chuck Norris: I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours. Can you? Chuck Norris: (laughs) How do you think the earth spins?
Vote:
has 81.95 % from 589 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sport
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Vote:
has 81.93 % from 329 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, technology