The best Chuck Norris jokes

The Statue of Liberty is alive, but Chuck Norris told her not to move.
Vote: has 82.93 % from 224 votes. Send joke:
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Chuck Norris can pick oranges from an apple tree and make the best lemonade youve ever tasted.
Vote: has 82.91 % from 64 votes. Send joke:
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If Chuck Norris was a spartan the movie would be called "1".
Vote: has 82.87 % from 289 votes. Send joke:
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Chuck Norris can experience a once in a life time occurrence... twice.
Vote: has 82.80 % from 121 votes. Send joke:
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They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
Vote: has 82.64 % from 400 votes. Send joke:
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Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
Vote: has 82.63 % from 220 votes. Send joke:
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Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Vote: has 82.61 % from 291 votes. Send joke:
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Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
Vote: has 82.60 % from 278 votes. Send joke:
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When batman is in trouble, he turns on the Chuck Norris signal.
Vote: has 82.54 % from 277 votes. Send joke:
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Chuck Norris beat Halo 3 on legendary, with a broken Guitar Hero controller.
Vote: has 82.51 % from 77 votes. Send joke:
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