Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
Who do you think would win in a fight? Godzilla or King Kong Neither, Chuck Norris doesn't let his pets fight!
A total eclipse won't look directly at Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris injected his blood into a monkey, a fish, and a lizard. They are now known as King Kong, Jaws, and Godzilla.
You might kill two birds with one stone, but Chuck Norris kills two stones with one bird.
Big foot claims he saw Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris was born, the doctor exclaimed, "It's a man!"
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself
The Guinness Book of World Records is actually Chuck Norris' elementary school report card.