The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris can give you a wet willie with a dry finger.
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Chuck Norris can use a touch screen without touching it.
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Chuck Norris can set magnifying glasses on fire...using ants.
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Chuck Norris can make a rock grow.
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Chuck Norris gets a the highest score possible on Wii Fit by sitting down.
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Chuck Norris does not open doors. Tthe doors have the common courtesy to open for him
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Chuck Norris once entered a black hole just to see what was in it. Dissapointed, he then walked out.
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Chuck Norris can make music in Adobe Photoshop.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use his hand to catch bullets, he uses his mind.
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Chuck Norris keeps a list of all his victims, it's called the phone book.
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