The Sun is Chuck Norris' camp fire.
CBS hired Chuck Norris to replace Charlie Sheen, now the show is called Ten and half Men.
Chuck Norris never bathes. Dirt is too afraid to cling to him.
Rambo is simply Chuck Norris disguised as Sylvester Stalone playing tag.
Leonardo DiCaprio only starred in Inception because if he didn't, Chuck Norris will enter his dream and roundhouse kick him into limbo.
Everytime a star explodes, it's because one of Chuck Norris's victims just landed there after being round-house kicked.
Chuck Norris tells his GPS when he wants to turn.
Chuck Norris uses gasoline as aftershave just for the pleasant tingling sensation.
Chuck Norris put corns in the Milky Way and eat them at his breakfast.
If you took all the worlds Super Heroes and combined them, Chuck would still kill them instantly.