Chuck Norris gives Freddy Krueger nightmares.
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Sticks and stones may break your bones but Chuck Norris' fists will kill you.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need to wear steel toes, his toes already are.
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Chuck Norris' blood is the only blood to test positive for kickass.
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Chuck Norris once broke the law... with his fists.
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In high school, Chuck Norris was voted "Most."
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There is only one award higher than the medal of Honor: The Chuck Norris Medal of Roundhouse.
No mortal man has ever earned it.
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Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
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Dear Chuck Norris,
Could you please close the door of your refrigerator.
Thank you,
Europe
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A train saw Chuck Norris on the track and turned down a dirt road.
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