Do you know why Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow? You just don't follow him that close!
Chuck Norris can win a Grammy from coughing.
The Twilight Zone enters the Chuck Norris Zone.
Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin... that he built with his bare hands.
After being shot by a criminal, Chuck Norris said... "that tickles".
Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
Uri Geller bends spoons with his mind, Chuck Norris bends minds with a spoon.
To run away from Chuck Norris man invented a car, then to catch them Chuck Norris invented crashes.
People have near-death experiences. Death has Near-Chuck-Norris experiences.
The earth doesn't revolve around the sun. It's the sun that revolves around Chuck Norris.
Out of 500 fights Chuck Norris has won 600.