Q: How many licks does it take Chuck Norris to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?
A: Zero. He simply stares at the candy and the outer coating is gone.
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Chuck norris can eat chicken tonight tomorow.
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When Chuck Norris rides into the sunset, the sun is actually running from him.
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Chuck Norris once went sky diving, he did not use a parachute.
The spot he landed on is now known as the Grand Canyon.
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When you look for Chuck Norris on Wikipedia, it redirects you to the article titled "Roundhouse kick."
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Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.
Chuck Norris is the only one who has a silver goldfish.
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Q: How many Chuck Norris' does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None. Chuck Norris can see in the dark.
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Chuck Norris doesn't tell lies. He changes facts.
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At museums Chuck Norris is allowed to touch the art.
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You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex?
Because he never fucks up.
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