A command was given to a dog: "SPEAK!" The dog said in return: "Not without my lawyer present!"
Man to lawyer: ‘If I give you £500, will you answer two questions?’ Lawyer: ‘Absolutely. What’s the other question?’
What do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? Insufficient sand.
Lawyer: ‘Now that you have been acquitted, will you tell me truly? Did you steal the car?’ Client: ‘After hearing you in court, I’m beginning to think I didn’t.’
Two attorneys were walking out of a bar and a beautiful young lady walks by. One attorney turns to his associate and comments "Boy, I would like to fuck her! The other attorney thinks for a second and said "Out of what"?
Why do they bury lawyers in 20ft holes? Because deep down they’re all really nice guys.
How come the lawyer got underground only by his neck? It was not enough sand...
Q: What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A good start!
Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road? A: There are skid marks in front of the dog.
What do you call ten lawyers buried up to their necks in the sand? Football practice.