The best jokes about men

I’ve know John a long time and am considered a bit of a father figure to him. I have watched him crawl around on his knees, drink from a bottle and I’ve cleaned up after him but enough about the Bachelor Party.
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has 34.78 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: men
What's the quickest way to lose 190 pounds of ugly fat? Divorce him.
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has 34.78 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: men
Why does a man like love at first sight? It saves them a lot of time.
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has 33.37 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: love, men, time
A man has 6 items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of Dial soap and a towel from the Holiday Inn. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 437. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.
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has 33.37 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: men, women
Why were men given larger brains than dogs? A.So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties. B.So they wouldn't stop to play with every other man they see when you take them around the block.
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has 33.37 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: dog, men
Why does a man prefer blondes? Men always like intellectual company.
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has 32.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: blonde, men
What is the difference between a man and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is a fish.
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has 32.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish, men
Men are like.....Vacations. They never seem to be long enough.
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has 32.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: holiday, men
Lets face it, there are a lot of dumb people out there. Sometimes you want to express how stupid they really are and here's how... An intellect rivaled only by garden tools. As smart as bait. Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash. Doesn't know much, but leads the league in nostril hair. Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor. Forgot to pay his brain bill. His belt doesn't go through all the loops. If he had another brain, it would be lonely. Missing a few buttons on his remote control. Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse. Receiver is off the hook. Surfing in Nebraska. An experiment in Artificial Stupidity. A few beers short of a six-pack. A few peas short of a casserole. The cheese slid off his cracker. Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear. Couldn't pour piss out of a boot with instructions on the heel. He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
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has 32.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: men
Man: Great idea, bad design.
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has 31.97 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: men
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