The best jokes about men

What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A.A dog is always happy to see you B.A dog only takes a couple of months to train.
Vote: has 32.54 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, dog, husband, men
Men are like.....Vacations. They never seem to be long enough.
Vote: has 32.54 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

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10 things men don't say 1)Let's watch Lifetime. 2)Sex is overrated. 3)I don't want to go too far on the first date. 4)Yes, your sister does have bigger breasts than you. 5)Don't we owe your mother a visit? 6)I'm relieved I don't have a large penis weighing me down. 7)Dessert goes right to my hips. 8)I hate when I miss Oprah. 9)Does this suit make me look fat? 10)I'll never get tired of listening to Dido.
Vote: has 32.30 % from 38 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men, mother in law, music, sex
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? ONE......He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.
Vote: has 31.97 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: light bulb, men
Man: Great idea, bad design.
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Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating? To stop the snoring before it starts.
Vote: has 31.56 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

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What do you call a handcuffed man? Trustworthy.
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What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business? 1) No mind. 2) No business.
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Men are like buses. They have spare tires and smell funny.
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Diamonds are a girl's best friend. Dogs are man's best friend. So which is the dumber sex?
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More jokes about: men