The best money jokes

Smile and the world audits your taxes.
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My uncle is very mean. I went round the other day and found him stripping the wallpaper. He wasn’t redecorating, he was moving.
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Anybody with money to burn will easily find someone to tend the fire.
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A business man called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I dont, Ive been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked, and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, Ive been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express."
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I hate paying my income tax. You should be a good citizen - why don't you pay with a smile? I'd like to but they insist on money!
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One evening, a Counselor saw Max on his hands and knees. 'What are you doing?' she asked. 'I'm looking for my dollar bill,' Max replied. 'I lost it down the road.' 'Why don't you look for it there?' 'Because the light's better here!'
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Visitor: You're very quiet, Jennifer. Jennifer: Well, my mum gave me a dollar not to say anything about your red nose.
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What’s the difference between your wage packet and your trouser packet? You don’t have to beg a woman to blow your wage packet.
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He was so poor all he had to wear as a boy were hand-me-downs. The real shame was that he had five older sisters.
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A man goes into a bar and seats himself on a stool. The bartender looks at him and says, "What'll it be buddy?" The man says, "Set me up with seven whiskey shots and make them doubles." The bartender does this and watches the man slug one down, then the next, then the next, and so on until all seven are gone almost as quickly as they were served. Staring in disbelief, the bartender asks why he's doing all this drinking. "You'd drink them this fast too if you had what I have." The bartender hastily asks, "What do you have pal?" The man quickly replies, "I have a dollar."
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