The best sport jokes

A couple of years ago the english national team was about to start training in preparation for an important qualifying match when the manager at the time, Sven-Goran Eriksson, discovered a big turd in one of the penalty areas on the practice pitch. Ok boys, he said, who's shit on the ground? Emile Heskey replied: "Me coach, but I'm good in the air!"
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has 63.22 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: soccer, sport
Three fans were bemoaning the sorry state of their football team. "I blame the general manager," said the first fan. "If he signed better players, we'd be a great team." "I blame the players," said the 
second fan. "If they made more of 
an effort, we'd score some points." "I blame my parents," said the third. "If I'd been born in Seattle, 
I'd be supporting a decent team."
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has 62.79 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: family, football, geography, management, sport
At a divorce court a family of bears is waiting for the judge to grant custody of little bear. The judge asks the baby bear, "Do you want to live with papa bear?" The baby bear replied, "No he beats me." The judge asked, so do you want to live with mommy bear! The baby bear said, "No she beats me too." The judge asked, "Then whom do you want to live with?" The baby bear says, "The Chicago bears, they don't beat anyone!"
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has 62.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: divorce, family, sport
Everyone could tell our son was a Tigers fan. When he was handed his diploma, he dropped it.
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has 62.50 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: graduation, sport
I wish this gym had a stationary bike built for two.
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has 62.30 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: fitness, flirt, gym, sport
Two man playing golf were held up by two women playing in front of them. One man said: "I'll walk up to them and tell them to hurry up." When he returned he said: "I have a problem, one of the women is my wife and the other one is my mistress." The second man said: "I'll walk up to them and hurry them up." He came back and said: "We both have the same problem.”
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: sport
Q: What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver? A: A bad golfer goes *Whack!* "Darn!", but a bad skydiver goes "Darn!" *WHACK!*
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has 62.13 % from 112 votes. More jokes about: golf, sport
Q: Where is the first tennis match mentioned in the Bible? A: When Joseph served in Pharaoh's court.
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has 62.10 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: bible, sport
Yo mamma so small she uses a Dorito for a hang lider.
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has 61.99 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: food, sport, Yo mama
A redhead, a blonde and a brunette were stuck on an island and had to get back home from the island. The redhead swims half way and drowns. The brunette swims half way and drowns too. The blonde swims halfway gets tired and swims back.
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has 61.96 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: blonde, desert island, redneck, sport, stupid
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