The best sport jokes

Yo mamma so small she uses a Dorito for a hang lider.
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has 63.32 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: food, sport, Yo mama
A foursome is waiting at the men's tee when another foursome of ladies are hitting from the ladies tee. The ladies are taking their time and when finally the last one is ready to hit the ball she hacks it about 10 feet, goes over to it, hacks it another ten feet and looks up at the men waiting and says apologetically "I guess all those fucking lessons I took this winter didn't help." One of the men immediately replies, "No, you see that's your problem. You should have been taking golf lessons instead."
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has 63.32 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: golf, men, sport, winter, women
I wish this gym had a stationary bike built for two.
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has 63.26 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: fitness, flirt, gym, sport
A couple of years ago the english national team was about to start training in preparation for an important qualifying match when the manager at the time, Sven-Goran Eriksson, discovered a big turd in one of the penalty areas on the practice pitch. Ok boys, he said, who's shit on the ground? Emile Heskey replied: "Me coach, but I'm good in the air!"
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has 63.22 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: soccer, sport
An optimist sees the best in the world, while a pessimist sees only the worst. An optimist finds the positive in the negative, and a pessimist can only find the negative in the positive. For example, an avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him. He decided to try to break the news to a friend of his, a pessimist by nature, and invited him to hunt with him and his new dog. As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. they fired, and a duck fell. The dog responded and jumped into the water. The dog, however, did not sink but instead walked across the water to retrieve the bird, never getting more than his paws wet. This continued all day long; each time a duck fell, the dog walked across the surface of the water to retrieve it. The pessimist watched carefully, saw everything, but did not say a single word. On the drive home the hunter asked his friend, "Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?" "I sure did," responded the pessimist. "Your dog can't swim!"
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has 63.22 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: sport
Your mama so fat, that she can use herself as a bowling ball and get 10 strikes in all of the lanes!
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has 63.07 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: fat, sport, Yo mama
In France, Chuck Norris accidentally won Tour de France by exercise bike.
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has 62.88 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sport
At a divorce court a family of bears is waiting for the judge to grant custody of little bear. The judge asks the baby bear, "Do you want to live with papa bear?" The baby bear replied, "No he beats me." The judge asked, so do you want to live with mommy bear! The baby bear said, "No she beats me too." The judge asked, "Then whom do you want to live with?" The baby bear says, "The Chicago bears, they don't beat anyone!"
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has 62.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: divorce, family, sport
Chuck Norris once bowled a 300... Without a ball... He wasn't even in a bowling ally.
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sport
Two man playing golf were held up by two women playing in front of them. One man said: "I'll walk up to them and tell them to hurry up." When he returned he said: "I have a problem, one of the women is my wife and the other one is my mistress." The second man said: "I'll walk up to them and hurry them up." He came back and said: "We both have the same problem.”
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: sport
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