Chuck Norris kissed a girl once.
She's still blushing, we call her Sun.
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Once Chuck Norris swam all the oceans for 7 days and oceans got cold.
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Chuck Norris built Rome with a box of scraps.
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Kids dream about having superpowers.
Superpowers dream about having Chuck Norris.
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Chuck norris can control chaos.
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Death once took Chuck Norris.
He regreted it.
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Men are like.....Weather.
Nothing can be done to change either one of them.
There was an old man named Bill, and one of the things he most enjoyed was playing golf with his old buddy Fred.
Bill's wife always commented on how happy he looked after a game.
But one day he came home from their weekly game looking terrible and very tired.
His wife asked, "What's the matter, Bill?
You always seem so happy after golf and you look miserable right now."
Bill said, "Well, something terrible happened.
Fred had a heart attack on the first hole."
"My God, honey!" said the wife, rushing to comfort him.
"That must've been terrible!"
"It was," he said.
"All day long it was: hit the ball, drag Fred to the ball, and then hit it again..."
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
A.A dog is always happy to see you
B.A dog only takes a couple of months to train.
Yo mama so stupid she tried to make an appointment with Dr.pepper.