Q: What do you get when 100 rabbits stand in a row and 99 take a step back?
A: A receding hare line.
A brunette, a red-haired and a blonde comes to an edge of a hill. The rule is: if you lie, you fall off the hill.
A brunette says: - I think I'm the most beautiful... And she falls off the hill.
A red-haired says: - I think I'm the most clever... And she falls off the hill.
A blonde says: I think... And she falls off the hill.
As my grandmother and I were walking towards the United Nations Building in New York City, we came upon a street evangelist who was trying to get the attention of passersby.
He urged those near him to flee from the wrath to come.
“I warn you,” he roared, “that there will be weeping, and wailing, and gnashing of teeth!”
An old woman in the crowd shouted snidely: “Sir, I have no teeth!”
“Lady,” the evangelist retorted, “teeth will be provided!”
Vote:
When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.
Vote:
Yo' mama so fat, she uses epileptic boys as vibrators!
Vote:
Your mamma so old that her first Christmas was the first Christmas when Jusse said his first words you a hoe.
How do you know when an Asian breaks into your home?
Your house is clean, your computer is fixed, and their still pulling out of your driveway.
Boy’s father come back from uk & was calling his wife.
Boy:- papa mom has died.
father slaped boy & said why u dont inform me when i was in America
Boy :- i thought i will give u a surprise.
What do you get if you cross a hippo, elephant and a rhino?
A Helephino!!
I got a cat the other day.
I had to swerve, but I got it.