Adam goes to God and says, "I would like a mate to please me and make living joyful. She should be beautiful and perfect in every way.
God says, "I can do that, but it will cost you a testicle, a kidney, and one eye."
To which Adam replied, "Well, what can I get for a rib?"
Why do men like masturbation?
It's sex with someone they love.
Q: Why did the blonde keep a picture of herself in her room?
A: So she could use it as a mirror.
What does a Blonde say during a porno?
There I am!
Yo Mama so old...
When Moses parted the Red Sea, he found yo mama fishing on the other side!
A blonde has been working in a broom factory since childhood, despite the state's strict anti-child labor laws, and has always been a good worker. But one day, she storms into her boss' office.
"I quit! That's it, I'm not working here anymore!"
"Why?" asks the boss. "What's the problem?"
"I've been working here for so long that I've grown the broom bristles between my legs. I can't take it anymore."
"Listen," the boss says. "That's perfectly normal. Look, I have those too."
"Oh, my God!" she exclaims.
"It's worse than I thought! You've also grown a broom handle!"
How much money did the bronco have?
Only a buck!
A blonde once shot an arrow into the air... but missed!
Q: How can you tell you have a really bad case of acne?
A: It's when the blind try to read your face.
Vote:
Why do men want to vote for a female President?
Because we'd only have to pay her half as much.