The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck norris can fix a plumbers crack.
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Obama's health care plan won't cover injuries caused by a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to the face. Nobody would survive anyway.
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Chuck Norris makes his own Girl Scout cookies using real Girl Scouts.
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Chuck Norris can mess with the bull without getting the horns.
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Chuck Norris doesn't get sun burnt; that would be a foolish thing for the sun to do.
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Chuck Norris rubs two pieces of fire together to make wood.
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Chuck Norris speaks english, french, spanish, italian and portuguese. At the same time in every sentence.
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Chuck Norris won the Kentucky derby, on a Unicorn.
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Chuck Norris' tears would save lives, if he'd cry.
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Chuck Norris didn't have a mum or dad, he created himself.
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