Chuck Norris made the universe... out of his snot and left kidney.
Chuck Norris is a fact.
Gravity is Space's way of trying to keep Chuck Norris away from it.
Chuck Norris once gave a fire hydrant a ticket for being next to his parked car.
Chuck Norris once toboggoned down Mount Everest and then sprinted back up cuz he realized he lost his mitten.
Chuck Norris isn't a cat person but if he was, he would own 3 lions, a snow leopard, and cougar.
Chuck Norris invented the question mark... so he could say the sentence "Do you want to die slowly of fast?"
The boogie man checks his closet at night for Chuck Norris.
If Chuck Norris jumped off the Empire State Building, your mom would tell you to do it too.
The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.