The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris doesn't give warnings. He doesn't have to, you should already know.
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All of Chuck Norris's opinions can be proven with science.
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Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his monther's womb.
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May 6th, 1945: A then five-year old Chuck Norris swam the Atlantic Ocean. The next day, the Nazis surrendered...
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The name of the anime Soul Eater was actually inspired by one of Chuck Norris' nicknames.
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Chuck Norris doesn't Tivo television programs. They come on when HE wants them to.
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Charlie Sheen can achieve recovery by taking a drug called Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once went to Stevie Wonders concerts and smiled at him; Stevie Wonder is now blind.
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Chuck Norris was once hospitalised, becaused he kicked his own ass.
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Chuck Norris once squeezed an M&M so hard that it turned into a Skittle.
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