The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris finds it impossible to understand the concept of impossibility.
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has 65.83 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris can close Pandora's Box.
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has 65.73 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Uri Geller bends spoons with his mind, Chuck Norris bends minds with a spoon.
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has 65.73 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once heard that nothing can kill him, so he tracked down nothing and killed it.
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has 65.57 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
There was no Big Bang at the beginning of the Universe, Chuck Norris simply sneezed.
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has 65.42 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer. Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.
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has 65.42 % from 133 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, friendship
Chuck Norris sees dead people...and they run.
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has 65.28 % from 110 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
The two thousand member Catholic church was filled to overflowing capacity one Sunday morning. The priest was ready to start the Mass when two men, dressed in long black coats and black hats entered thru the rear of the church. One of the two men walked to the middle of the church while the other stayed at the back of the church. They both then reached under their coats and withdrew automatic weapons. The one in the middle announced, "Everyone willing to take a bullet for Jesus stay in your seats!" Naturally, the pews emptied, followed by the choir. The deacons ran out the door, followed by the choir director and the alter boy. After a few moments, there were about twenty people left sitting in the church. The priest was holding steady in the pulpit. The men put their weapons away and said, gently, "All right, Father, the hypocrites are gone now. You may begin the Mass."
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has 65.27 % from 97 votes. More jokes about: catholic, christian, Chuck Norris, vulgar
Chuck Norris' toothpaste doesn't have baking soda in it, it has gunpowder in it.
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has 65.20 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Once, Chuck Norris only filled his name in on the SAT. He got a perfect score.
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has 65.19 % from 87 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
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