The best Chuck Norris jokes

When Chuck Norris finds fools' gold it automatically turns into real gold. Chuck Norris is nobody's fool.
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Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin... that he built with his bare hands.
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Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
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Why does Chuck Norris have a beard? A better question is what will he do to you if you ask him?
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Chuck Norris is the only man to punch a cyclops between the eyes.
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Chuck Norris made a statue bleed.
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Chuck Norris can Moonwalk on the Sun.
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Chuck Norris does not need guns to win, he only uses them to fight fairly.
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There is only one award higher than the medal of Honor: The Chuck Norris Medal of Roundhouse. No mortal man has ever earned it.
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Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
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