Give Chuck Norris a piece of coal and he'll give you back a diamond.
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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
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Chuck Norris is the only person to really have "Birthdays".
The rest of us have "Thank you Chuck for allowing me to live another year- days".
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Chuck Norris can get a strike in bowling using a ping-pong ball.
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Chuck Norris had a staring contest with a picture.
And Won.
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Chuck Norris can buy priceless moments. At a discount price.
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Chuck Norris beat a laser beam in a race.
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Chuck Norris won the Tour De France on a stationary bike.
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Bob the Builder asks if we can fix it, Chuck Norris already did.
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Chuck Norris graduated from the School of Hard Knocks with an MBA - Mega Bad Ass.
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