The best Chuck Norris jokes

Some people can ride their bikes with no handle bars. But chuck norris can ride his handlebars with no bike.
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has 65.48 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris doesnt walk, the earth moves under his feet.
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has 65.48 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
The two thousand member Catholic church was filled to overflowing capacity one Sunday morning. The priest was ready to start the Mass when two men, dressed in long black coats and black hats entered thru the rear of the church. One of the two men walked to the middle of the church while the other stayed at the back of the church. They both then reached under their coats and withdrew automatic weapons. The one in the middle announced, "Everyone willing to take a bullet for Jesus stay in your seats!" Naturally, the pews emptied, followed by the choir. The deacons ran out the door, followed by the choir director and the alter boy. After a few moments, there were about twenty people left sitting in the church. The priest was holding steady in the pulpit. The men put their weapons away and said, gently, "All right, Father, the hypocrites are gone now. You may begin the Mass."
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has 65.41 % from 81 votes. More jokes about: catholic, christian, Chuck Norris, vulgar
Chuck Norris finds it impossible to understand the concept of impossibility.
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has 65.39 % from 71 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
All wars stopped when Chuck Norris said, "Can I apply for the army?"
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has 65.24 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
When a mime sees Chuck Norris, he makes a glass wall and pretends he's dead.
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has 65.24 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris will never die. The Grim Reaper is too scared to come and claim him.
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Sundials tell the time according to the position of Chuck Norris.
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has 65.16 % from 116 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time
The light at the end of the tunnel is actually Chuck Norris holding a flashlight.
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has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris uses pepper spray to clear his sinuses.
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has 65.08 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
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