Even though Chuck Norris' lives in Dallas, Texas, his house still has spectacular views of both the Atlantic and Pacific oceans.
If you see the Blue Screen of Death on your laptop... it's because Chuck Norris found out you were reading Chuck Norris jokes.
Chuck Norris once had a heart attack; his heart lost.
Chuck Norris can sit in the shade...in an open field.
Chuck Norris isn't a good shot, his bullets just know better than to miss.
Chuck Norris douses all his food in diesel fuel and sets it on fire, 'cuz he likes it mildly spicy.
Chuck Norris went an hour without killing... just to kill some time.
Chuck Norris can play the saxophone... while holding his breath.
Chuck Norris believes in victim's rights. His victims have the right to dig their own graves before he kills them.
Chuck Norris can in fact eat water.