The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris was mauled by a bear once, then the bear woke up and apologized.
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has 66.25 % from 120 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
With just two toothpicks, a lightbulb, and his RoundHouse Kick, Chuck Norris can override the Pentagon's computer system.
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has 66.21 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer, technology
The role of terminator was originaly played by Chuck Norris, but they decided against it as no-one would want to shit their pants for two hours strait.
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has 66.21 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Jokes about Chuck Norris are not funny, but all are afraid not to laugh.
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has 66.21 % from 133 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris doesn't even have to bid in an auction to win it.
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has 66.16 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
The two thousand member Catholic church was filled to overflowing capacity one Sunday morning. The priest was ready to start the Mass when two men, dressed in long black coats and black hats entered thru the rear of the church. One of the two men walked to the middle of the church while the other stayed at the back of the church. They both then reached under their coats and withdrew automatic weapons. The one in the middle announced, "Everyone willing to take a bullet for Jesus stay in your seats!" Naturally, the pews emptied, followed by the choir. The deacons ran out the door, followed by the choir director and the alter boy. After a few moments, there were about twenty people left sitting in the church. The priest was holding steady in the pulpit. The men put their weapons away and said, gently, "All right, Father, the hypocrites are gone now. You may begin the Mass."
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has 65.94 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: catholic, christian, Chuck Norris, vulgar
Superman can leap tall buildings in a single bound. Chuck Norris just picks the buildings up and moves them out of his way.
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has 65.80 % from 92 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
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has 65.73 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
NASA is negotiating with Chuck Norris about using his roundhouse kick as a propulsion to get to Mars.
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has 65.73 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, travel
Only Chuck Norris can tell you the answer to your question before you ask it.
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has 65.63 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
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