Chuck Norris doesn't sweat. He forces the air around him to cry and uses it's tears to cool himself.
Chuck Norris once stared death in the face... Death pissed his pants.
Chuck Norris once spelled the entire alphabet using only M&Ms.
Chuck Norris' pulse-rate is measured on the Richter Scale.
Chuck Norris' shadow stays ten steps behind him in fear of a roundhouse kick.
Chuck Norris once walked down a street with his fists in his pockets. He was then arrested for concealing two deadly weapons.
Chuck Norris was bitten by a werewolf. When full moon came, the werewolf turned into Chuck Norris.
While we all get checked by the airport security, Chuck checks the airport security.
Chuck Norris can turn a vegan into a cannibal.
Chuck Norris will never die. The Grim Reaper is too scared to come and claim him.