Chuck Norris can find a hay in a needle stack.
Chuck Norris doesn't use a coffee maker, he puts the coffee beans in his mouth and boils them with his rage.
Once an email was sent from LA to Washington. Chuck Stopped it at St. Louis.
Chuck Norris can in fact eat water.
Chuck Norris can finish Mario Bros without using the jump button.
The Total Gym uses Chuck Norris to stay in shape.
When Neil Armstrong first landed on the moon he saw aliens worshiping Chuck Norris's footprints.
Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
When Chuck Norris falls over, the ground needs a band-aid
Chuck Norris can see all 50 states from his house.