Chuck Norris can flip a coin and make it land on both sides at the same time.
The Guinness Book of World Records is actually Chuck Norris' elementary school report card.
Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
Micheal Jordan to Chuck Norris: I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours. Can you? Chuck Norris: (laughs) How do you think the earth spins?
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off
Chuck Norris met an exclamation point and punched it in the face. We now have questions.
They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
Chuck Norris shot a man to death with an unloaded nerf gun.
Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.