Chuck Norris is so hot he makes the sun sweat.
Chuck Norris's black belt was made in a black hole.
You know Chuck Norris' pet lizard, right? Last I heard, he was in the movie "Godzilla". Oh, and his pet turtle starred in "Gamera" as well.
Chuck Norris can make a pound cake with only an ounce.
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
Chuck Norris looked Medusa straight in the eyes, and laughed.
Chuck Norris can won the winter Olympics... In the summer.
If it walks like a duck, talks lidek a duck, and smell like a duck but Chuck Norris says it's a girrafe. It's a damn girrafe!
Chuck Norris won American Idol, only using sign language.
If you look back far enough in your family tree, Chuck Norris appears at least three times.