If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
If Chuck Norris were a cat he would have ten lives.
When Chuck Norris bakes cookies for his enemies, he adds his own secret ingredient to make a special taste to it. Its called "defeat".
A company once tried to make Chuck Norris toilet paper, but they soon realized it wouldn't work because Chuck Norris won't take shit from anyone.
If only telemarketers would have the balls to call Chuck Norris... Then none of us would have to put up with them again.
Chuck Norris' driver's license simply shows his shoe size.
Chuck Norris cannot be put in a corner. The corner always backs away.
Chuck Norris ate a sheet of paper, then later found an origami swan in the toilet.
Chuck Norris can read an eye chart with his eyes closed.
Chuck Norris is the only one that can turn lemonade into lemons.