Chuck Norris is so sharp you can cut yourself just by looking at him.
When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.
Q: How many Chuck Norris' does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: None. Chuck Norris can see in the dark.
When Chuck Norris cuts onions, the onins cry.
Across all of the infinite number of parallel universes the version of Chuck Norris is the same. Nature knows perfection when she sees it.
Chuck Norris will be the star lead in the remake of the movie "300" it will now be called "1"
Chuck Norris can run a nuclear power station using a rowing machine.
Out of 500 fights Chuck Norris has won 600.
Each hair on Chuck Norris' beard holds the soul of a victim.
Ghosts are created when Chuck Norris kills people to fast for the grim reaper to prosses.