Chuck Norris has no need for a TV remote. He stares at his television, until it changes the channel.
If you don't know who your father is, odds are it's Chuck Norris.
During the Vietnam War, Chuck Norris allowed himself to be captured. For torture, they made him eat his own entrails. He asked for seconds.
Chuck Norris has a lot to contribute to the Third World... War.
Chuck Norris can strike the same lightning twice.
At an exhibition of military painting a visitor was admiring a picture. "What a great realist that painter is!" he exclaimed. "What painter?" "The one that painted this picture 'Soldiers at Work'." "Yes, hut something is wrong there. Those soldiers aren't working at all!" "That is just the greatest stroke of realism in the picture!"
What's red and crawls up your leg? A homesick miscarriage.
If Chuck Norris was a villian in a video game, you'll never win. But if he was the hero, it's unplayable; because no one controls Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not know about this website. If he did he would have just deleted the internet.
Q:Why did the cow cross the road? A:To go to the moo-vies.