Q: In what way are Democrats more generous than Republicans? A: Unlike Republicans, Democrats are not only generous with their own money, but also with other people's money.
Q: What's the difference between white jews and black jews? A: Black jews sit at the back of the oven
Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence–a life sentence. Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached. Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind. Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman's finger and two under the man's eyes. Marriage requires a man to prepare 4 types of "rings": * The Engagement Ring * The Wedding Ring * The Suffe-Ring * The Endu-Ring
My girlfriend always calls me a pedophile, and all I can think is "Wow that is a big word for a nine year old."
There is a 3 story apartment building with 1 apartment on each floor. A white family lives on the top floor. A mexican family lives on the second floor. A nigger family lives on the botom floor. At 2:00 PM in the afternoon a terrrible tornado hits the building, totally destroying it. Which family lived? The White family, because both parents were at work and the kids were in school.
How can yo tell if a black has been on you're computer? It's not there...
Q: Whats the definition of vagina? A: The box a penis comes in.
A police officer stopped a driver for speeding. "Can I see your driving license?" "I don’t have it, I had it removed because of point system." "Can I see your license for the vehicle?" "But it is not my car, I stole it." "Stole it?" "Right, let me think, I think I saw the permition before in the glove box when I put my gun in there." "There is a gun in the car?" "Yes sir, I put it right there, when I shot and killed the woman driving this car and then put the body back to the trunk." "There is a corpse in a car?" "Right, sir." After all these he calls the police chief. And soon the car gets surrounded by police. The captain approaches the driver to handle the situation. "Sir, can I see your qualification?" "Of course, ultimately, there it is." "In fact, it’s OK, and to whom does the car belong to?" "It is mine, there is my license as well." "uld you open the glove box, is there a gun inside?" "Of course, take a look, there is nothing." "Do you mind opening the trunk too? They told me that you put a body in there." "No problem, take a look." "Empty too! But I do not understand, the officer who stopped you told us that you said that you did not have a driving license, that you stole the car, that you had a gun in the glove box and that there was a dead body in the trunk." "Oh right! I bet he told you that I was running and speeding!"
A couple celebrates their 30th anniversary by re-walking their first walk together. They come to the fence against which they first made love. The husband says, "Come on, for old time's sake." The wife agrees and they both undress. Afterwards, the husband says, "You're even better than you were 30 years ago." His wife replies, "That fence wasn't electrified 30 years ago!"
Q: Why are black people so afraid of ghosts? A: Because they are haunted by dead kkk members!