The best animal jokes

A guy walks into a bar with a giraffe, and the giraffe gets waay too drunk. The bartender says, "Hey! you can't leave that lyin' there!" The guy goes, "that's not a lion its a giraffe!"
Vote: has 32.54 % from 13 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, bartender, drunk
Q: What do you call a black and white thing rolling down a hill A: A maori and a segull fighting over a fishhead.
Vote: has 32.47 % from 43 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, black people, racist, white people
A fellow always wanted to own a pet skunk, so in the dead of winter, he took his girlfriend with him to go hunting for one. After a bit of waiting, they bagged a skunk and brought him back to the truck. The skunk was very scared and very cold, so the guy asks his girlfriend if she can keep the skunk between her legs to keep him warm. "But what about the smell?" asks his girlfriend. "Oh, he'll get used to it, just like I did."
Vote: has 31.97 % from 28 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, disgusting, hunting, relationship
What does a spider do when he gets angry? He goes up the wall!
Vote: has 31.97 % from 18 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal
A hippo once told me he hated gangs, but then he joined one What a HippoCrip.
Vote: has 31.97 % from 18 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal
How does a frog feel when he has a broken leg? Unhoppy.
Vote: has 31.97 % from 18 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal
What’s the difference between a pigeon and a nigger? The pigeon is white and the nigger can’t fly!
Vote: has 31.66 % from 63 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, black people
Q: Why do gorillas have big noses? A: Because they have big fingers!
Vote: has 31.56 % from 11 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal
Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating? To stop the snoring before it starts.
Vote: has 31.56 % from 11 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, men
Why can’t elephants go on the beach? Because they can’t keep there trunks up.
Vote: has 31.56 % from 11 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal


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