The best animal jokes

A young woman was having a physical examination and was very embarrassed because of a weight problem. As she removed her last bit of clothing, she blushed. "I'm so ashamed, and dirty Doctor," she said, "I guess I let myself go." The physician was checking hers eyes and ears. "Don't feel ashamed, Miss. You don't look that bad." "Do you really think so, Doctor?" she asked. The doctor held a tongue depressor in front of her face and said, "Of course. Now just open your mouth and say moo."
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has 32.93 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, doctor, women
Q:Why did the cow cross the road? A:To go to the moo-vies.
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has 32.79 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal
What is a frogs favorite time? Leap Year!
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has 32.79 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, time
Why is manna from heaven like horse hay? Both are food from aloft!
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has 32.79 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, heaven
What is the difference between a man and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is a fish.
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has 32.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish, men
Why can’t elephants go on the beach? Because they can’t keep there trunks up.
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has 32.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
What's the difference between an old cat and a baby kitten? An old cat scratches and bites but a little pussy never hurt anybody!
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has 32.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: age, animal, cat, kitty
Q: Why did the atheist throw her watch out the window? A: She wanted to see if it was designed intelligently enough to evolve into a bird.
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has 32.12 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, atheist
A fellow always wanted to own a pet skunk, so in the dead of winter, he took his girlfriend with him to go hunting for one. After a bit of waiting, they bagged a skunk and brought him back to the truck. The skunk was very scared and very cold, so the guy asks his girlfriend if she can keep the skunk between her legs to keep him warm. "But what about the smell?" asks his girlfriend. "Oh, he'll get used to it, just like I did."
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has 31.97 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, hunting, relationship
What does a spider do when he gets angry? He goes up the wall!
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has 31.97 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
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