The best blonde jokes

What is the difference between a blonde and a toilet? After you use a toilet it doesn't follow you around for three days.
Vote: has 39.21 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

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There are three 6th grade girls: a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. Which one has the biggest tits? The blonde....she's 18.
Vote: has 38.99 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, ginger, school
Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? She kept throwing away all the W's!
Vote: has 38.22 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, Yo mama
A young man wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife something nice for their first wedding anniversary. So he decides to buy her a cell phone. She is all excited - she loves her phone. He shows her and explains to her all the features on the phone. The next day the blonde goes shopping. Her phone rings and it's her husband. "Hi Hon," he says. "How do you like your new phone?" She replies, "I just love it. It's so small and your voice is clear as a bell. There's one thing I don't understand though." "What's that, baby?" asks the husband. "How did you know I was at Wal-Mart?"
Vote: has 36.90 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

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How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday Night morning? "Tell her a joke on Monday Morning."
Vote: has 36.51 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, time
A blonde phoned police to report that thieves had been in her car. "They've stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, even the accelerator," she cried out. However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time and the same voice came over the line. "Never mind, I got in the back seat by mistake."
Vote: has 36.32 % from 97 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, car, cop, phone
A blonde decides to learn and try horse back riding unassisted, without prior experience or lessons. She mounts the horse with great effort, and the tall, shiny horse springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. Out of shear terror, she grabs for the horse's mane but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup. She is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground again and again. As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness or even death when Frank, the Wal-Mart manager, runs out to unplug the horse.
Vote: has 36.09 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What do you call an eternity? A: Four Blondes in four cars at a four way stop.
Vote: has 36.09 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

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What do you call a blonde with a brain? A golden retriever.
Vote: has 36.09 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What do Darren Millane (Collingwood footballer killed in a recent car crash) and a blonde have in common?  A: Put either of 'em in a car and they're fucked.
Vote: has 35.78 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, car, death, soccer