The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris once stared death in the face... Death pissed his pants.
Vote:
has 59.60 % from 88 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris does not play the lottery. It doesn't have nearly enough balls.
Vote:
has 59.56 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, money
They wanted to put Chuck Norris's face on Mount Rushmore, but the granite wasn't hard enough for his beard.
Vote:
has 59.54 % from 118 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris can sit in the shade...in an open field.
Vote:
has 59.29 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris adds Facebook as a friend.
Vote:
has 59.28 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Facebook
Person 1: Global Warming doesn't exist. Chuck Norris was cold so he turned the sun up. Person 2: That's bullhsh*t! everyone knows Chuck Norris doesn't get cold!
Vote:
has 59.23 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, weather
Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.
Vote:
has 59.20 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can startle his own reflection.
Vote:
has 59.20 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Right angles used to be called wrong angles until Chuck said, "I don't see anything wrong with them."
Vote:
has 59.20 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Lou Gehrig considered himself the luckiest man on the face of the Earth, no one knew that it was because he was soon getting away from Chuck Norris.
Vote:
has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
<<<57585960
More jokes →
Page 57 of 250.