Chuck Norris terrorizes terrorism.
Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.
Chuck Norris doesn't get sun burnt; that would be a foolish thing for the sun to do.
Chuck Norris once gave blood, it was put in cans and labelled 'Red Bull'.
Chuck Norris dosent swim, water just likes him.
Chuck Norris doesn't need his seatbelt becouse no one is stupid enough to hit him.
Chuck Norris once cried just to see what it was like. The end result was the creation of life.
Chuck Norris uses black holes to clean his dishes.
The beatles originally said they were "Bigger than Chuck Norris", John Lennon was simply a warning.
Someone asked Chuck Norris to climb Mount Everest. After his 10th endeavor, he wrote a book. "Ten Different Ways to Climb Mount Everest"