Chuck Norris gives poison ivy a rash.
A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
When Chuck Norris finds fools' gold it automatically turns into real gold. Chuck Norris is nobody's fool.
Archeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"
Chuck Norris can make a snowman with sand.
Chuck Norris can make you fold a Royal Flush.
Chuck Norris can make a rock grow.
Chuck Norris doesn't use OFF! Mosquitos instinctively know not to bite him.
Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
Harry Potter needs 8 movies to seek and destroy Voldemort. Chuck Norris needs 4 seconds.