Chuck Norris not only speaks in the third person, he sees in the third person.
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If you took all the worlds Super Heroes and combined them, Chuck would still kill them instantly.
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Chuck Norris paints little red wagons for a living with his victim's blood.
But not the wheels.
That's just wrong.
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Chuck Norris destroyed the Lord of Rings. Twice.
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Chuck Norris has a daugter: Jason Bourne.
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The only time Chuck Norris made a mistake was when he thought he made a mistake
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Chuck Norris goes to Silent Hill for the weekends.
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Chuck Norris once climbed the empire state building and roundhouse kicked the human spider off the top.
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The party only starts when Chuck Norris walks in.
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In the beginning, God created light because Chuck allowed him to.
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