Once Chuck Norris met a man on a horse that he did'nt like, now we know him as the headless horseman.
When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
Once while having s*x in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and ran into the engine. We now know this truck....as Optimus Prime.
Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Chuck Norris.
For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one
Chuck Norris once created a time machine and had to fight himself. We call it The Big Bang.
When someone is in trouble it's a job for Superman, when Superman is in trouble it's a job for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once lapped his opponent...in a drag race.
Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
If it walks like a duck, talks lidek a duck, and smell like a duck but Chuck Norris says it's a girrafe. It's a damn girrafe!