The best Chuck Norris jokes

The only sure things are Death and Taxes…and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
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Chuck Norris can shut the door open.
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Chuck Norris can eat just one pringle.
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Chuck Norris is the only one who doesn't have to tell PayPal to switch the funding source to his credit card.
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Chuck Norris once toboggoned down Mount Everest and then sprinted back up cuz he realized he lost his mitten.
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Chuck Norris was once so famished, he ate Turkey. The country there now is only an impostor.
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It has been said that if you name any custom class in Call of Duty "Chuck Norris" you will instantly win every match you set foot in.
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Chuck Norris invented the question mark... so he could say the sentence "Do you want to die slowly of fast?"
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The boogie man checks his closet at night for Chuck Norris.
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If Chuck Norris jumped off the Empire State Building, your mom would tell you to do it too.
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