Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
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Q: How many licks does it take Chuck Norris to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?
A: Zero. He simply stares at the candy and the outer coating is gone.
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The ground hog only pokes his head out to check for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can blow up things, without a bomb.
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The universe expands because the stars believe this way will be safer from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris's version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.
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Do you know why Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow?
You just don't follow him that close!
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Chuck Norris can kill with blank bullets.
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Ed and Lorraine Warren have the doll Anabelle locked in a glass case in their basement, a priest comes there every week to whisper Chuck Norris's name in its ear.
The doll locked itself in the case upon first hearing the name.
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Chuck Norris is the four horsemen of the apocalypse!
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