When Chuck Norris rides into the sunset, the sun is actually running from him.
Bill Gates once asked Chuck Norris to be his personal body guard for an hour, he couldn't afford it...
Chuck Norris once slapped a man into next week. The man was missing for four and a half years.
Big Brother isn't watching you. Chuck Norris is watching you!
You know the movie, Alien VS Predator? Well it used to be called Alien VS Predator VS Chuck Norris, but no body would pay to see a fight 7 seconds long.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.
911 calls Chuck Norris for emergency.
On Halloween, children give Chuck Norris candy.
When you google up Chuck Norris, he googles you back for revenge.
Chuck Norris' day consists of 25 hours.