Chuck Norris doesen't fly, gravity collapses around him.
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When Chuck Norris visits Africa, the animals are required to stay in their cars.
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Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.
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Chuck Norris once starred in Wheel of Fortune.
The last twenty nine minutes were spent in an awkward silence, waiting for the wheel to stop spinning.
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Chuck Norris doesn't get sun burnt; that would be a foolish thing for the sun to do.
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Chuck Norris can flush a port-a-potty.
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Chuck Norris has a basement in his treehouse.
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When Chuck Norris kills time, that'll be the end of it.
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Chuck Norris doesn't take the cake, the cake sees Chuck Norris and begs to be devoured.
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When Chuck Norris punches someone in the stomach they get hit in the back of the head.
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